K-Y's Guide to Exploring Kinks With Your Partner

Kinks are an intriguing conversation in the world of sexual exploration. While people enjoy the most basic forms of sex and foreplay, there should be no shame in experimenting with sexual kinks that are outside of the boundaries of “typical sex”. 

From bondage to spanking, kinky sex can be incredibly thrilling for couples to explore together. Read on as we guide you on how to open up to your partner about your kinks so that you can make these fantasies a sexy new reality within your relationship.

What are Kinks?

Kinks are defined as any form of sexual activity that does not fall into the category of “conventional sexual acts”. Using a combination of fantasies, sex toys, role playing and more, kinky sex is often contrasted to anything that is regular or vanilla in nature. 

It’s completely healthy and normal to desire kinky sex! According to a recent study on sexual exploration, over 22% of adults engage in role play and over 20% engage in activities that involve being tied up or spanked. 

Other common forms of kinky sex include BDSM, fetishes, group sex, and voyeurism or exhibitionism.

Sex Tips for Exploring Kinks

Like most other things in life, kinks fall onto a spectrum. Once you explore your own boundaries with your partner, it becomes much easier to try new sexual positions or activities that fall outside of your regular sexual repertoire. 

Here are our top 3 sex tips to get you started.

1. Have an honest conversation about sexual kinks

Before diving headfirst into kinky sex, it’s important to open up a conversation about boundaries, desires, and expectations first. 

Though it may be tempting to have this conversation while you’re getting physically intimate with your partner, it’s better to do so when there is no opportunity for them to be swayed through passion or arousal. Once you find time outside of the bedroom to discuss, make sure to be very clear about what you like, need, and desire sexually and to explain this in an honest and positive way. 

Remember to give your partner the opportunity to discuss their own kinks or sexual curiosities too! Ask plenty of questions, avoid judgment, and compromise on certain sexual scenarios that work best for both of you before exploring any further.

2. Choose a safe word

A safe word serves as a signal to your partner that you want to put an immediate end to the kink you’re engaging in. This safe word should be something that you don’t typically say during sex such as “pineapple”, “vanilla”, or “unicorn”. 

Your safe word can also help modify the speed or intensity of the kink. For example, the word “yellow” means slow down, “green” means resume, and “red” means stop. In this situation, safe words help couples last longer and gain the most pleasure from their kink.

3. Prioritize mutual pleasure

Above all else, it’s important to remember that kink is more about mutual pleasure than anything else. Without enjoying the act of both giving and receiving, it’s not going to be a healthy experience. 

For most types of kink play, lube features to help enhance comfort and pleasure. The best lube type for comfort and sexual enjoyment is K-Y® LUBRICANT Naturals® Moisture+ Intimate Gel. This water-based formula adds natural moisture to the most intimate areas to increase pleasure even during the wildest kinks. With only a couple of drops, the lube sensation can take your kinky sex to the next level in mutual pleasure. 

*Ensure this product is right for you. Always read and follow the product label before use.

Key Takeaways

Whether you’re new to the world of kink or are looking to push past your current comfort zone to spice up sex with your partner, these tips can help make it safer and more exciting! 


When in doubt, buy lube to help you explore new kinks. K-Y products pair well with sex toys and even the most sensitive skin types.