How to Feel Secure in Your Relationship?

Insecurity is a common theme in many relationships. Whether or not this insecurity is rooted in some past experience, such as being cheated on or feeling emotionally unsafe or unworthy, neglecting to manage these feelings can draw a wedge between you and your partner down the road.

Although feelings of security don’t always happen overnight, taking the right steps to develop confidence from within can evolve into enhancing feelings of security in your relationship.

Read on as we explore some of the best sex tips and expert advice to help you feel more secure in your relationship and how this can translate to more confidence, intimacy, and passion in the bedroom.

Build Your Self-Esteem

Research has found that people with higher levels of relationship insecurity tend to have lower levels of self-esteem. It’s no surprise that when we feel better about ourselves, we are more likely to transmit these positive vibes to the world around us. Having better self-esteem can also decrease the need to seek approval or validation from an outside source, or in this case, your partner.

Building your self-esteem doesn’t have to be challenging. In fact, it takes only a couple of simple daily actions: learning to silence your inner critic to minimize negative self-talk and practice self-compassion on a daily basis.

Not only will these two actions help boost your feelings of confidence and self-assurance, but it’s also linked to helping increase feelings of sexual desire. With more security comes a higher sex drive – all great things when it comes to bringing couples closer together.

Get to Know Yourself on an Intimate Level

Feeling a sense of security on a sexual level starts by discovering your own intimate desires. One of the best ways to build sexual confidence is by learning what you like and don’t like so that you can be open, vulnerable, and unapologetic in the bedroom.

One of the best ways to get comfortable on your own is by using a lube type that feels amazing on your body. Lube features help you get into the mood faster, heighten sensations of physical touch, and promote feelings of sexual competence.

For optimal lube sensations try slipping into something more comfortable with the K-Y® Lubricant Liquid *. This water-based formula is excellent lube for couples when you feel ready to explore together with your partner.

*Ensure this product is right for you. Always read and follow the product label before use.

Take Initiative in the Bedroom

When we question our confidence or security in the bedroom, it can cause us to shy away from initiating intimate acts, including foreplay and sexual intercourse. However, the more we avoid them, the harder it becomes to overcome this barrier.

According to social psychologist Amy Cuddy, the act of “faking it till you make it” has been shown to help cultivate an attitude or perception of competence. In turn, acting in a way that transmits feelings of security can actually help you become the person you want to be.

Start gradually by becoming flirty with your partner through dirty talk, passionate kissing, or teasing. Eventually, you could find yourself more willing to act on your sexual desires and begin to spice up the intimacy inside and outside the bedroom.

The Bottom Line

Feeling insecure in your relationship can be deeply rooted in the belief that you’re not good enough, or that you’re not deserving of love from your partner. These tips serve as a guide to building a more confident and happier version of yourself in your relationship.